In the Same Boat: A Mother's Story of Managing Bedwetting in Twins
By Melissa Granberry
Imagine the frustration Lisa Stewart* is experiencing. She has an 11-year-old who wets the bed, and she has tried everything to help him – restricting fluids, moisture alarms, even medications – but there are no dry sheets in sight. It is easy to envision the high stress level for both Mom and Child in this situation.
Now, multiply the bedwetting by two. That's right! Stewart's son is a fraternal twin, but both sons have identical problems: bedwetting. What does this mean for the Stewart family? Double the late night sheet changes, double the sour smells that just won't come out of the mattresses, double the piles of laundry, and most importantly, double the frustration.
Seeking a Solution
Not only do both twin boys wet the bed, they are also both sound sleepers. "For the last year or so the boys have set their alarm to midnight to at least reduce the quantity [of urine]…," says Stewart. Unfortunately, the only person the alarm wakes up is Mom. "They can sleep through this alarm clock for hours," she says. After the alarm has gone off for about 30 minutes, Stewart drags herself out of bed to shut off the noise and get the boys up to go to the bathroom.
In addition to waking the boys during the night, Stewart has also tried moisture alarms and a "potty pager." The pager vibrates intermittently to awaken the wearer. "It worked for a couple of weeks, maybe a month," says Stewart. Then the boys grew used to the device and slept right through the vibrations. "I cannot imagine being able to sleep through that, but they did!" she says.
Medication to stop the bedwetting was also unsuccessful. "The medicine may have helped with one or two dry nights in a month," says Stewart. "My primary concern was that I didn't think the benefits outweighed the risks associated with the drug."
The boys are currently trying a different medication to expand their bladder capacity at night. "The bladder capacity is increasing," says Stewart. "But we aren't getting a lot of dry nights."
Until they grow out of bedwetting, the twins have been wearing disposable absorbent undergarments at night. Previously, they wore GoodNites® Underpants to help them keep the sheets dry at night. However, now at 140 pounds, the boys have outgrown children's products and have moved on to adult undergarments. They also use disposable pads under the fitted sheet and wear sweatpants at night, which help absorb "leaks."
Moving On
When the Stewart family moved to a new town, the boys had a brief glimpse of what it feels like to wake up dry. "The boys were completely and totally dry for three months during our move," says Stewart.
During that time, the twins' father stayed behind to sell the house and tie up loose ends. "The twins were the ‘men of the house' and were not as comfortable in our new home," says Stewart. She believes that since the boys did not feel as safe in their new surroundings, they did not sleep as heavily as they had before the move. Once their dad moved in and they became comfortable with the new house, dry mornings were a thing of the past!
In It Together
At times, experiencing bedwetting with a sibling can make the situation easier. "[The twins] do talk to each other about it, and they talk to us as well," says Stewart. "We are lucky that they are both considerate children and don't give each other too much grief."
Is there a downside to having a sibling who wets the bed? Stewart says occasionally one of the boys will go through a "dry spell" and may go for several days or more without an incident. "When this happens, the other guy feels like an underdog of sorts," says Stewart. "But it usually evens out in the long run."
A Sensitive Issue
Though the boys can turn to each other for support, the bedwetting is taking its toll on their self-esteem. Sleepovers and camp are one of the most affected areas of their social life, and the boys rarely attend these overnight functions. When they do spend the night away, they take a change of clothing and try to be discreet.
The Stewarts try not to make a big deal about bedwetting, but sometimes their sons' frustration surfaces. "Every once in a while one of them will bring it up in a conversation, asking questions like ‘Why does this happen to me?' and ‘When will it stop?'"
Though Stewart doesn't have an answer for the boys, she does have some "survival" tips to share with other moms: She suggests using Scrubbing Bubbles® for cleaning after a late night bathroom break, when aim is not a priority for boys. She also finds that Oxi Clean® Laundry Detergent is effective at helping remove stains on the mattress.