When I met my husband-to-be, he had a darling son named Ben who was 3 years old. Ben was a very loving, sensitive boy, and I adored him. He seemed to be well-adjusted and happy, but like many children his age, he still wore a diaper at night.
By the time he was 4, my husband began to feel frustrated by the bedwetting. Working with my husband, we began trying various reward systems and behavior modifications to stop the bedwetting, but nothing worked. Ben also had a very difficult time falling asleep at night. He often ended up in our room in the middle of the night, soaking wet and miserable. There would be a soggy diaper to toss and wet sheets to wash. Then the struggle to get him to sleep would resume once again. We were exhausted and exasperated. Even though we had little energy left, we wanted to protect his self-esteem and told him there was nothing wrong with wetting the bed. We also promised him that we would figure it out together as a family.
As the years went by, we sought help from our pediatrician, tried the nose spray, bedwetting alarm and various medications, but nothing worked. We eventually taught Ben to clean up the sheets by himself and to take a shower each morning. Although it was a challenge for us all, it was hardest for Ben. Not wanting him to feel discouraged or lack self-esteem, we shared with him information from our family doctor that explained many boys his age still wet the bed. He seemed comforted by the information.
However, when we traveled home to visit family, his bedwetting frustrated his grandmother. She had eight children of her own, and none of them had wet the bed. Each and every time we stayed with her, Ben drenched the bedding. There was even a night when his socks were soaking wet. His grandma felt that there was something wrong with Ben and became stressed as soon as we arrived in her home. I couldn't blame her for feeling frustrated, as it was a huge hassle each day to clean up after him.
We began putting GoodNites® Underpants on him during our visits to her house. They helped so much and took a lot of the strain out of the visit for all of us. They worked so well that we began using them at home. The mornings went a lot more smoothly for Ben when he just had to climb out of bed and toss his wet GoodNites® Underpants into the trash. There was no more immediate laundry at the beginning of each day and less stress for all of us. Ben started to feel a small sense of control over his bedwetting.
Ben was also able to go to sleepovers without worrying about soaking sheets or having his friends know he was a bedwetter. I would pack a GoodNites® Underpants into his backpack, and his friends never knew. I usually called the friend's mother to let her know about the situation so that she could help with discarding the GoodNites® Underpants and hiding any traces of his immature bladder. His secret protection helped him feel just like the other boys and kept his self-esteem intact.
Ben was almost 14 years old before his bladder matured and he did not need absorbency support. Because of our experiences, I have a lot of empathy for parents who have children who wet the bed at night. It can be a confusing and frustrating time. I learned a lot of patience along the way and learned that children mature when they are supposed to and not one day sooner. Parents need to take a deep breath, relax and realize there will be a day when their child is dry at night.
Ben is now 17 and still remembers the long years he wet the bed. As he got older, the bedwetting could have eaten away at his self-esteem, but our constant reminders that many other children also wet the bed helped him feel better about himself.
