My daughter, who is 4 years old, wet the bed about a week ago, and as I was talking to her about what she had done, she said she was sweaty and that the bed was wet. I tried to tell her that it was all right and that I wasn't mad, but she kept on saying that she didn't wet the bed. It was just that she was really sweaty and that's why the bed was wet. I know not to yell at her for this because I had the same problem when I was young. So should I be worried that my daughter doesn't want to admit to wetting the bed?
Answer
Don't insist that your daughter admit she wet the bed. Children at that age really can talk themselves into believing many things that are not true. It is possible she really does believe she was sweating. She has probably had the experience of sweating during a very hot day and seeing her shirt get wet. It isn't unreasonable for her to conclude the same thing about the bed. Even if she knows she is not telling the truth, what she is really saying then is "I'm embarrassed." Do her a favor and don't insist she believe your version of events.
Mom might say: "OK, maybe you did sweat and not wet the bed. But we still need to have a change of clothes ready in case it happens again.
"Whether you wet the bed or simply were sweaty, it's OK to wake me up if you notice the bed is wet and I can help you feel more comfortable.
"Either way, it must be uncomfortable for you. It's not a problem for me to change your sheets. Just let me know when the bed is wet and uncomfortable."
Paul Coleman
Psychologist
Family Therapist
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